I am going to share with you my morning breakfast with Makenzie, my two-year-old daughter, that we had the other day. My hope is that it will spur parents on to sharpen the way they interact with their children. For me, this was an awesome experience and Makenzie manages to bring it like this 24/7. In reading this, I hope that we will not look at it “from a worldly point of view,” but with spiritual eyes. 2 Corinthians 5:16.

My morning started with Makenzie coming into our bedroom and waking us up by saying, “I went pee pee in my diaper.” I then, still half asleep said, “Ok, go throw it out and go pee pee.” She comes back 20 seconds later and says, “I can't,” while holding her diaper up. It then dawned on me that last night I was using the kitchen trash can and I filled it up to the brim and didn't change it. We'll call that correction number one. It is sloppy and lazy to fill up the trash and not empty it.

I get out of bed and she says, “I want Rice Krispies.” So I set her up with that and she then says, “I want milk in the juice cup.” So I ask her, “This one?”

She replies, “No.”

“Is it this one?”

“No.”

“How about this one?”

“No.”

I then say, “Which one is the juice cup?”

She says, “The blue one.”

So I look around for a blue cup and I see that it is dirty and in the dishwasher waiting to be washed. So I ask her if it is okay to use another one and I show it to her. She inspects the inside of it and then acquiesces to my plea. At this point, I was like, “Phew.” So I pour her milk and she starts drinking.

Little by little my conscience convicts me that I should give her the cup she wanted, after all, it only takes a little effort on my part, right? It also occurs to me that we should always clean her dishes by hand right away just in case she may want one of them. Correction number two brought on by Makenzie in the first five minutes of waking up.

So I wash it and I take the other cup that she was drinking and pour out that milk into the sink (somehow it had 2 strands of cat hair in it) and I filled up her blue juice cup with the last little bit from one of the gallons that we had and I put it in front of her thinking, “Problem solved, I'm such a good dad.”

She looks inside her blue juice cup and says, “It's smaller. It's got to be bigger.”

“Ok.” I knew she was right. In the last cup she had, she had more. So, I return to the fridge and pour her some more milk. I then asked her if that was okay. She said yes.

Now mind you, all I've managed to complete this whole time is Rice Krispies and milk. She then asks for the red cover for her cup. So I gently appealed to her to drink it without the cover because I am training her to drink from a regular cup and not spill anything. So she acquiesces.

In the middle of her eating, I start feeding the cats and Leonidas and she sees this and says, “I want to feed them.”

I said, “eat your food,” not wanting it to get soggy. I then consider her, so I brought the cat food over to her so she could hold their bowl while I poured it. I then grab a scoop of dog food and put it into the dog bowl myself. He had food leftover from yesterday so I only put one. She demanded, “That's not enough. Give him more.” I said, “That's enough, look he doesn't need any more.” She insisted, “No, give him more.”

This ended with me winning her over by saying, “I am the one who taught you how to feed him and I'm telling you that that is enough, if not too much.” She then acquiesced. The cool thing in this is that she is totally winnable, but you really got to bring it and be right.

So why in the world do I share this?

First of all, I know that I am very fortunate to not have to leave my house in the morning at a certain time, so I am grateful to God to allow me undivided time every morning to engage her like this. I know that some don't have the time like this.

I believe that parents would tone down their children's questions, or use their authority over their children, or tell them “no,” or what to do, because it is easier for the parents and that is wrong. In love, I actually prefer letting her be totally equal with me or even higher as we engage each other. I let her boss me around, I plead with her for forgiveness on very small matters. I do not make use of my rights or authority unless really necessary.

My hope for you is that you may try to build like that. It is totally freeing for the children to be able to speak and act freely. They will be real and not walk around on eggshells.

She is one sharp girl, certainly sharper than I will ever be and I can't let my shortsightedness get in the way of her because of inconvenience, preference, simple-mindedness, or desire for quietness or easiness, etc.

It is much better to have to pour it out and have to become much more for her benefit than settling in the low valley that most parents settle in when raising their children. It takes a lot of work.

And that was breakfast with Makenzie. It's good to be in Christ. “Life to the full.” John 10:10.

Thank you God.